“Come on! Let’s go, let’s go! Out the door, we’re late,” I yelled as I slipped on my shoes!
“Mom, aren’t we always late, though?”
Glaring at my 10-year-old, I replied, “Not today! Now move, move, move!”
Despite my shouts to hurry all the way out to the car and my somewhat-reckless driving, I still managed to be a few minutes late to work. Again.
For the first time in nearly 18 years, I have crossed over from being a stay-at-home mom to a working mom. Thankfully, it’s a part-time job, but I have certainly had my share of struggle in getting my feet wet in the work world again! I have the best job a mom could ever want working at my kid’s school. I also have the best boss and co-workers a girl could ever ask for. So why all the struggle?
After a couple of meltdowns and a few conversations with my longsuffering husband, the truth began to niggle at my heart.
The problem was me.
Well, my control-freak nature, to be more exact.
HOW I KNEW I WAS A CONTROL-FREAK
It had to be my way. My kids have always done chores, but I never realized how much energy I spent “re-doing” what they had already done. Since going back to work, I no longer have time to “re-do” anything. Instead of being grateful for what my kids were doing, I found myself stressing because – well, my vacuum lines had disappeared! Instead of encouraging my kids by what they were accomplishing, I was mourning the fact that the towels were not “properly” folded and placed on the shelf.
I couldn’t let things go. It didn’t seem to matter how tired I was, falling asleep was a struggle. My endless to-do list kept swirling through my thoughts, and I even found new things to add to it. I couldn’t shut off my brain. I also couldn’t let conversations or arguments go until everyone agreed with me, or at least saw it from my point of view! When I disappointed one of my kids or a family member because I was just too busy, I agonized over it for days!
I began to pass the blame. Once I started to feel life spiral out of control, I decided that NOTHING was my fault! Those dirty dishes in the sink and piles of unfolded clothes were no longer MY fault! But, it had to be somebody’s fault, so I blamed the kids, my husband, that phone call, ANYTHING but me! Contention started to build up in our house, but it wasn’t MY fault!
If you are an “A-plus” personality, chances are you’ve used it as an excuse to cover your control-freak tendencies.
“Um, because of my ‘a-plus’ personality, I’m going to ask that you do it this way.”
“I’m sorry, but my OCD is coming out in me. Do you mind if I fix this?”
Listen, I know more than anyone, the wonderful benefits of being a control freak! It’s a great motivator, and can actually help us get more accomplished in our tight schedules!
But, what does the Bible have to say about the common qualities of someone who likes to be in control?
WHAT THE BIBLE HAS TO SAY
A control-freak is prideful – What is the driving force behind someone with an “A-plus” personality? Pride. Wanting things done a particular way (ours) prevents us from putting our faith in God! Pride is a dangerous place for a Christian to be! In fact, King Solomon said that God hated the sin of pride!
“These six things doth the Lord hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto him: A proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood,”
– Proverbs 6:16-17
A control-freak has no peace – It is impossible for us to control every aspect of our lives. Just when we think we’ve got things under control, life happens, and we find ourselves in impossible situations. We lose sleep and develop anxiety over the things we can’t control!
But, when we live our lives surrendered to God, and allow Him to have ALL the control, those impossible situations have hope! When we put our trust in God that all things work together for good, we can have peace!
“Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee.”
– Isaiah 26:3
The next time you catch yourself blaming your OCD, or your “a-plus” personality, just stop! Admit you’re a control freak! Surrender your life to God (daily) and determine in your heart to give up control!
Bible Verses for the Control Freak: