One day, I had found myself standing in the adult diaper section of the grocery store. I was angrily swiping away tears, trying to decide what size my husband would need. Once I got home, I had allowed myself to become filled with rage. How could radiation do this to my husband!?
That day, I allowed a tiny seed of doubt to be planted in my heart. That tiny seed then began to grow, until it bloomed into an ugly blossom of worry.
Watching the car steer off the road, I looked at the driver. Her eyes were closed, her mouth gaping open. She was unconscious, and she was about to hit a telephone pole! Adrenaline rushed through my veins, and I quickly made a u-turn. By the time I managed to get back to the run-away car,... Continue Reading →
Before the chemo was able to get it's gripping arms around my husbands body, we celebrated by going out for lunch. As we ate, we talked of all God had done for us in the last chapter of our lives. What did we learn? How would our lives be different? What advice would we give others?
I have wondered if this was the moment He began to carry the weight of sin for the entire world! How did Jesus respond to anxiety? He prayed, and He continued on with His task.
Not only had God allowed all of this struggle into our lives the last two years, but His hand was there the whole time, leading us. Excitement began to replace our wonder, and thankfulness.
After that day, I slowly began to get better. Then, one morning I woke up and realized it had been a few days since I had felt the anxiety. Soon the days turned into months.