Meditation Monday – Joyful Trials

Published on by Carrie NehmerLeave a comment

Have you ever noticed someone going through a difficult time in their life, yet they still managed to have a smile on their face?  Before you credit their own strength, consider their source of power.  God has promised “fullness of joy” for any who dwell in His presence.  No matter how difficult your life may be, walking in the presence of God gives genuine peace (Phil. 4:7), and that is something to smile about!

“Thou wilt shew me the path of life: in thy presence is fulness of joy; at thy right hand are pleasures for evermore.” – Psalms 16:11

 

The Unseen Hand

Published on by Carrie Nehmer1 Comment

In January of 2015, my husband began rubbing his chest.

“My heart won’t stop racing!”

“Was it a stressful day at work,” I asked?

We had been talking for the last couple of months about how something had to give with Gabe’s job.  Not only was he driving an hour to work, he was working 10 to 12 hour days before driving another hour home.  It was starting to wear on him, and our entire family was effected by the high demands of his career.

A few days later, Gabe started to have chest pain.  It was enough to make him question if he was having a heart attack.  It was time to go to the hospital.

In the emergency room, Gabe’s heart rate was crazy.  One minute it was 70 and the next it was over one hundred!

“Atrial tachycardia“, the doctor had said.  “We will keep you until the medication begins to regulate your heart.”

After two days, the medications were not helping.  They sent him home with a scheduled procedure for the next week.  He would be having a heart ablation, a seemingly simple procedure where they pricked a tiny hole between the heart chambers and burned away excess tissue surrounding the heart.

The procedure, though uncomfortable, was a complete success!  We went through the rest of 2015 with no other health struggles or emergency room trips.  Until, exactly a year later, in January of 2016.

“I’m taking you to the ER”, I insisted as I drove my family home from church.

“Just let me go home to bed”, Gabe argued.

“You have had a headache, dizziness, nausea and now vomiting for the last week!  You couldn’t even sit in your chair tonight, and I have stopped twice on the way home now, so you could throw up!”

After finding a babysitter and getting my kids off to bed, I practically dragged my husband to the car.  It didn’t take long to get him registered in the hospitals emergency room. After several hours of tests, two doctors came into the tiny room.

“Unfortunately, the test results show that you had a stroke in your cerebellum.  We need to keep you here to run more tests.”

My husband and I looked at each other in shock.  He was only 45, after all.  We were not expecting this kind of news until we were at least in our 70’s!

The next day we learned that the stroke was more than likely the result of a blood clot that was thrown from the tiny pin-prick hole between his heart chambers.  While they couldn’t prove it, it was the only theory that made sense.

As my husband was being released with strict instructions for “no work, no stress, no noise”, we were visited by an endocrinologist.

“Before you leave, you need to know that the MRA revealed a large mass on your thyroid.  In a couple of months, after you have had some healing time from your stroke, you need to see a surgeon.”

We were so focused on healing from the stroke, that we found we weren’t too worried about the mass on Gabe’s thyroid.  A few months later, a biopsy revealed cancer.

“It’s actually a blessing you had the stoke.  Since you were not having any symptoms, we would have more than likely caught this cancer when it was much worse”, the endocrinologist explained.

In July of 2016, Gabe had surgery to remove his thyroid.  Cancer was found in three places.  By September, he was finished with his  radioactive iodine treatments.  Gabe was back to healing from his stroke, and his surgery.

By Thanksgiving Gabe was starting to feel pretty good.  He had begun to return to the office a few days a week, and we were making some exciting plans for 2017.  Only, Gabe had began to notice a lot of blood in the toilet.  Realizing it could possibly be from the blood thinners he now had to take, he felt God was urging him to mention it to his doctor.

In January of 2017, Gabe received a phone call from the gastroenterology.

“The biopsy from your colonoscopy came in today.  I’m sorry, but you have colon cancer.”

For the next two weeks, my husband and I struggled with our emotions.  One minute we felt peace and complete trust in God and the next minute, fear and despair would overwhelm us.  Hadn’t we been through enough?  A heart procedure,  stroke, thyroid cancer, and now colon cancer?

After two weeks of grieving, the fog began to lift from our emotions, and we began to think more clearly about our situation.

“Gabe, do you realize you wouldn’t have had the stroke if you hadn’t had the heart ablation?”

“Yes,” he replied.

“And you wouldn’t have learned about the thyroid cancer if you hadn’t had the stroke.”

The worry wrinkle on my husbands face began to smooth away, as he began to understand my meaning.

“If I hadn’t been on the blood thinners, they never would have discovered the colon cancer.”

We sat together in awesome wonder.

We really could trust God!  He really DID know what He was doing! It was pointless to question Him!  Not only had God allowed all of this struggle into our lives the last two years, but His hand was there the whole time, leading us.  Excitement began to replace our wonder, and thankfulness.

Yes, thankfulness.  For the stroke, the thyroid cancer, and even this colon cancer. For all the time off work my husband had to take, the millions of doctors appointments and the growing pile of medical bills.  For the stress of juggling crazy schedules, and the fearful thoughts of “what if”.  We have witnessed God’s perfect timing, His perfect thoughts, and His perfect ways.  We have received blessings from His hand through the giving hands of our brothers and sisters in Christ. We are thankful for all of it, because while it was difficult (I would be lying if I said it wasn’t), we have been able to experience God’s unseen hand in our life.

There is an unseen hand to me
That leads through ways I can not see
While going through this world of woe
This hand still leads me as I go.”

– Bill Gaither

 

 

Overcoming Anxiety Series #1 – What Is Anxiety?

Published on by Carrie Nehmer2 Comments

Article disclaimer: I am not a medical or psychiatric professional, nor am I qualified to give medical advice. This series on anxiety is based solely on my own experience and research. These articles are not intended to replace professional medical advice or diagnose or treat medical conditions. Please seek council from your doctor before making any changes to your prescription health regime.

If you were to poll several random people on what the definition of anxiety is,  you would receive several different answers.

Some would define anxiety as the feeling they get when they have lost their car keys, or have an exam to study for. While these feelings can certainly be described as “anxious”, they are not the kind of anxiety I will be talking about in this series.

Anxiety physically affects people in many different ways.  It is usually not the same from one person to the next.  Symptoms of anxiety can range from very mild (headaches or nervousness) to very extreme (panic attacks or inability to function in society).

What is the Definition of Anxiety?

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines anxiety as this: “painful or apprehensive uneasiness of mind usually over an impending or anticipated ill; fearful concern or interest; an abnormal and overwhelming sense of apprehension and fear often marked by physiological signs (as sweating, tension, and increased pulse), by doubt concerning the reality and nature of the threat, and by self-doubt about one’s capacity to cope with it.

WebMed (http://www.webmd.com/anxiety-panic/understanding-anxiety-symptoms) describes multiple symptoms of generalized anxiety as the following: “persistent fear, sometimes without any obvious cause, that is present everyday; inability to concentrate; muscle tension; muscle aches; diarrhea; eating too little or too much; insomnia.”

What Causes Anxiety?

When trying to determine the cause of anxiety, one must consider several different factors.

The Spiritual Factor

The spiritual factor is the most common answer for anxiety sufferers among Christians today. It is often assumed that the individual is backslidden or not trusting God with their problems. While this may at times be the case, I have personally known spiritual Christian women and men, who suffer from anxiety. In fact, the weakness that anxiety caused in their lives eventually became their strengths, because they had completely given them over to the Lord.

I have heard of instances where a lost individual struggling with anxiety, trusted Christ as their Savior and found they had not only gained Heaven, but they gained victory over their anxiety! The worry they had over their eternal future had given them such turmoil, it was causing them great anxiety in other areas of their lives. Solely trusting in Christ gave them power to break the chains of fear and anxiety! If you are not sure of your own eternal destiny, please read this article that tells how there is HOPE for you!

For the Christian, there is always a spiritual factor related to anxiety. God may be using anxiety as a tool to draw you closer to Himself. He could be using anxiety to prove His precious promises to you! Do not brush aside the spiritual aspect to your anxiety problems.

The Physical Factor

At times, anxiety can be the result of an underlying medical condition, such as a malfunctioning thyroid or adrenal gland. Once you realize that you have anxiety, it is important to go to your doctor to make sure your symptoms are not the result of something medical.

I have read of many anxiety sufferers finding relief from their symptoms by making simple dietary changes. Some popular trends are ketogenic and whole food diets. Removing processed foods and drinks from their diets had helped improve how they felt and the frequency of panic attacks.

While I cannot say that lack of exercise contributes to symptoms of anxiety, exercise has been found to help reduce its symptoms, and therefore is worth mentioning.

When our bodies begin to lack the minerals and vitamins it needs to properly function, our bodies can react with symptoms of anxiety. I will not go into detail in this series on what supplements can be used to help relieve anxiety. However I strongly encourage you to do your own research, and to not rule out natural remedies in aiding your treatment for anxiety symptoms.

The Mental Factor

Every-day stress can contribute to the mental factor of anxiety. The burden of finances, children, caring for elderly parents, your own health, and even your ministry can weigh you down and cause mental anguish.

On a daily basis we are filling our minds with something. Talk radio, the 11 o’clock news, Netflix, and even gossip are just a few things we allow into our minds.

As Christians, we need to recognize our need to limit the negativity we allow into our minds. Turn off your radio and TV! Turn off your phone!  Walk away from gossip!

Philippians 4:8 – “Whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report, if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.”

Filling your mind with Scripture, worship, and positivity is a HUGE healing step towards overcoming anxiety.

Recognizing Anxiety

Some people with severe anxiety question their diagnosis and believe their symptoms are some kind of medical issue. The doctors must have missed something! They will spend excess amounts of time and money, going from doctor to doctor, requesting test after test, before finally accepting their diagnosis. Once they have come to terms with the reality that what they have is truly anxiety, they will finally begin the healing process.

Conclusion

Once you have accepted the fact that you have anxiety, and you have recognized the three factors that could be causing your anxiety, you need to determine your path of healing. 

Natural healing is one option that is not widely known. While this healing path is a longer road, it has much less unpleasant side effects, both short and long-term. Finding the right balance of minerals and vitamins for your body is a journey that will require much patience, but I believe in the end, is very rewarding. 

Prescription medication is a more known option for anxiety sufferers. While the effects are immediate, most anxiety medication is not meant for long-term use. Antidepressant medications can be taken long term, but over time, doses will need to be adjusted. Like anxiety medication, antidepressants can also have unpleasant side effects both short-term and long-term.

So how do you know what is right for you? The best way to determine what healing process best suits your own personal situation, is to seek council. A pastor, herbalist, physician, or a psychologist are all ways for gaining knowledge of what your options are. Have your spouse or a close family member help you in your decision process. Lastly, don’t forget to pray. Ask God to direct your decision, and to lead you on the correct path. 

Remember, every person is different. Not only will each person’s cause for anxiety be different, their level of anxiety and reaction to anxiety are going to be different, as well. It is only logical to assume, that each person will heal differently. So don’t get discouraged if your healing process is longer, or different from someone else’s! God has promised to give us wisdom if we ask. Once you have prayed and soght council, be confident in the direction God has guided you.

If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.

James 1:5 KJV

http://bible.com/1/jas.1.5.KJV

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If this article was helpful to you, please be sure to like it! If you know of someone who suffers from anxiety and is searching for answers, please be sure to direct them to Claiming the Promise!

Stay tuned for next week’s Overcoming Anxiety Series #2 – Six Helps for Christians With Anxiety.


Meditation Monday – Breaking the Chains of Fear

Published on by Carrie NehmerLeave a comment

Palms sweating, I gripped the steering wheel tight. I knew the snow flakes were melting on the black pavement, but my heart still raced. What if the melting snow began to freeze? Lightly tapping the brakes, I slid into the right lane and turned on my hazard lights. Breathing in short, deep breaths, I slowly made my way home, tears spilling down my cheeks. 

15 years ago, I was involved in a serious car accident that resulted in a trip to the hospital. When I was released, I sported several stiches, a black eye, and a new fear of driving. For several weeks, fear held me captive in my own home. Finally, my husband encouraged me to get behind the wheel again. After many months of slow driving, deep breathing, and tears, I was finally driving normally again.

Is there a fear in your life holding you captive? It may take time before you are able to break those chains of captivity, but don’t give up. You might have to go slow, and there may be tears, but keep persevering! Remember, God did not bind you in those chains of fear. He gave you the power to break free! 

For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. – 2 Timothy 1:7

My Story with Anxiety

Published on by Carrie NehmerLeave a comment

Hello, my name is Carrie.  I’m a mother of 4 crazy kids between the ages of 7 and 15.  I’m also married to a wonderful man who has battled a stroke, thyroid cancer, and now stage 3 colorectal cancer, in just the last two years. The last couple years have been very stressful to be sure.  God has been with me each step of each day.  The times I want to fall apart and throw a huge temper tantrum, God’s overwhelming peace floods over me.

I never would have been able to get through these difficult times without God’s precious promise of peace.  And I never would have claimed God’s promise of peace without the journey through anxiety He brought me through several years ago.  I want to share my story with you, because I want you to know that I understand what you may be going through.

One beautiful spring morning I woke up feeling as though I had the stomach flu.  Adrenaline rushes knocked me off my feet. My heart was palpitating, and I thought I was going to vomit.  I felt better in bed, so I went back to bed.  My husband stayed home to help with our kids getting to school and to take care of our toddler boys. For several days I struggled.  I would get up each day, try to eat, then wind up back in bed.  Finally, after five days of this, I went to the doctor, thinking maybe it was my gallbladder or something.

“It sounds like you might have anxiety.”

“No, I’m a stay-at-home mom.  I don’t have that much stress in my life.  Besides, I’m a Christian.  I don’t believe in anxiety.”

“Even stay-at-home moms can have stress in their lives.  Even if you don’t believe in anxiety, I really believe this is what you have.”

Later that day, my husband took the kids to the park.  I came along, even though I felt as though I was in a fog.  I felt like I wasn’t even really there.  Watching my kids play, I called my sister and sobbed on the phone.  My sisters are my rock.  Not only do they listen well, but I often glean from their wisdom. I was surprised when she confided something to me that I had never known.  She too, had struggled with anxiety.

The next day, I got out of bed.  I got dressed.  I did my hair. I dry-heaved.  I took my kids to school. I cried.  I had panic attacks.  I cried some more.  I prayed and begged God to take this feeling of anxiety away.

Over the next year, I literally fought a battle with anxiety. I was stubborn.  I wouldn’t take medication.  Instead, I went to a local herbal and vitamin store and talked to the owner who guided me to many supplements and vitamins.   I started exercising, and changed the way I was eating.  I began drinking healthy green smoothies and eliminated caffeine.  I had to take care of myself physically, so I could take care of my family. I realized, though, that healing from anxiety was not all physical.

Taking care of myself mentally was not something I even realized I was doing at the time.  I had a friend who knew what I was going through, who remained in contact with me through it all.  She didn’t judge me, she only encouraged me and gave helpful advice.  She told me I was strong enough to get through this, and reminded me of God’s promises of peace. Looking back, I could not have gotten through that time in my life without my friend. 

I also began to realize I had to stop focusing on what I was feeling and the only way I knew to do that was to focus on other people.  I began to write cards for sick church members, bake bread for neighbors.  I made it a goal to do at least one thing for someone else every day.

The most important and effective change I made in my life during this time was to strengthen my relationship with the Lord.  Being a second-generation Christian, I grew up memorizing the scripture and hearing it preached and taught from the pulpit.  All those precious promises spread throughout the Word of God were only words to me.  I had never had reason to claim these promises.  Promises of unconditional love, bountiful peace, and endless joy.

Most mornings I woke very early, and very suddenly, with my heart pounding a million miles a minute.  Reading my Bible was the only thing that could calm my heart, and it took on a different meaning in my life.  I LIVED to read my Bible, and the peace that would flood through me as I read.  In the beginning, I only read through Psalms.  I read them over and over.  I kept a notebook with my Bible and wrote out the verses that I felt God was giving me.

I would also take very early walks. This was my prayer time with God.  Before the sun was up, I would begin my walk around my neighborhood, talking to Him.  Usually crying and begging Him to heal me, or at least help me get through the day.

Physically, I was dealing with some serious symptoms of anxiety.  Heart palpitations, shaky legs, dry mouth, headaches, severe nausea.  I had lost 40 lbs in just a few months. I had separation anxiety issues.  I would cry and throw myself into my husbands arms when he would come home from work. (My poor husband!!)

One day, I reached a pivotal moment.  It had been 9 months, and I was still struggling.  I was on my morning walk, and had ended my walk by going to my back porch.  Our back yard is beautiful.  The city made a sanctuary out of a piece of land behind our house that has a large pond on it.  I can see it very clearly from my back porch, along with lots of tall grasses and beautiful trees.  As the sun came up, it’s rays filtering through the tree branches, tears streamed down my face.

“Lord, if You want me to have anxiety the rest of my life, I accept it.  Please just be with me to help me bear it.  You are Good, You are God, and You are Holy and Just.  I praise Your Name.  Thank You for giving me this anxiety.”

After that day, I slowly began to get better. Then, one morning I woke up and realized it had been a few days since I had felt the anxiety. Soon the days turned into months. 

I would like to say that my anxiety has never returned, but the truth is, there are still days it rears its ugly head head in my life. It’s different now, though.  Now I know that it’s going to be OK.  That God is on my side.  That there is HOPE.  I have PEACE.  JOY is always within reach.

I have a new life verse.

Philippians 4:7 says, “And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.”

It is special to me because I learned through experience that God can and will “keep our minds” if we seek Him and trust Him.

The picture below was taken two summers ago when our family went camping at Lake Huron.  I am in no way a photographer, but this sunset was so gorgeous and so beautiful.  It is just an example to me of the great things God has done in my life, and how He has blessed my journey through anxiety.

The purpose of this blog is to help encourage other Christians who struggle with anxiety.  God can bring you through to the other side, and you too can have peace.

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Meditation Monday – Those Crazy Moments

Published on by Carrie NehmerLeave a comment

It’s usually not until I’ve dropped my kids off at school, and I’m driving home in silence, that I realize my crazy morning had gotten the best of me. Tense muscles and a strong desire for a second cup of coffee are a sure sign that I was overwhelmed by my crazy morning! 

Let’s face it, we’ve all had moments that have overwhelmed us! Whether it’s a crazy schedule or a stressful situation, if you find yourself overwhelmed, try meditating on this: God was already in that crazy moment! 

“When my spirit was overwhelmed within me, then thou knewest my path.” – Psalms 142:3a

Not only can God see what is ahead on our path, He is there ahead of us, waiting to lead us through. When we are able to humble ourselves to God, and follow Him through the crazy moments, there is always rest on the other side! 

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If you’ve enjoyed this short devotional, consider following my blog! You will be notified every Monday morning when a new “Monday Meditation” will be posted! 

The End of Summer and a New Beginning

Published on by Carrie Nehmer1 Comment

This week marks the end of summer for our family. Monday beings the craziness of school, sports, and music lessons. While I’m sad to see lazy summer days go, I’m looking forward to getting back to a routine.

This summer was more laid back than usual for our family. Because Gabe needed to be close to the cancer center, and because the treatments were making him feel sick, any overnight trips were difficult to plan.

We did manage to get away for one night at Port Crescent State Park in Michigan! Their cabin that sleeps six had an opening at the last minute, and since Gabe had just finished his radiation treatments, we decided to go. It was wonderful! We had our own private beach right outside the cabin. I’m so thankful we were able to go!

Our beach scene from the front door of our cabin at Port Crescent State Park.

I also was able to make it to Lexington, Kentucky for a quick weekend to meet my brand new, great-niece! Kennedy Diane Calhoun is so precious, and I can’t wait to see her again soon!

Welcome to the world, Kennedy Diane!

Finally, I was able to take the kids to the Toledo Zoo. If you have never been there, you should go. The Toledo Zoo has been voted one of the top ten zoos in the United States. It had been a few years since we were there last , so it was fun to get to spend that time with the kids.

Six more weeks and Gabe’s treatments will be over! Gabe will get a final scan to confirm the cancer is gone, and then declared NED (no evidence detected). After five years of being NED, he will officially be in remission! 

As I look forward to life returning to normal for our family, I also feel a little timid in leaving this valley behind. You see, God has been here with us. 

We’ve seen Him work miracles. He has provided every single need, and blessed us above what we ever imagined He would! The close fellowship I have had with Him, and the peace that I have experienced while walking through this valley with Him, has been life-changing. I’m thankful for how He led me through the most difficult time of my life! 

For me, this is not just the end of another summer. It is a beginning of a new normal. I don’t know what our new normal will look like. I do know I don’t need to worry. If I can trust God to get us through a difficult year-and-a-half, I can most definitely trust Him with normal!

“Many are the afflictions of the righteous: but the Lord delivereth him out of them all.” – Psalms 34:19

Why I Stopped Questioning God

Published on by Carrie NehmerLeave a comment

Looking at the brilliant rays of sun, splashing it’s morning colors across the sky, I swiped away the tears streaming down my face.

“God, why are you still allowing me to suffer with this anxiety!? What possible good could come from this kind of mental anguish?”

The sun sprayed it’s light across my face, warming my cheeks where tears still glistened. As I leaned against the railing of my back porch, I closed my eyes, allowing the early morning light to dry my tears.

A chorus I had learned as a teenager at Bible camp came to mind. A peace I didn’t have a moment before filled my heart. Suddenly, my tears of grief turned into tears of joy, for I knew the words were true, and they brought me comfort. I began to sing the simple words with a shaky voice.

“My Lord knows the way through the wilderness, all I have to do is follow. Strength for today is mine all the way and all I need for tomorrow.”

I’d like to say I walked away from that moment 4 years ago with an answer from God. But no, I did not recieve an answer. 

In fact, over the years I have only had more situations come up in my life that I could question God about. Yet, since that day on my back porch, I no longer question God.

WHY I STOPPED QUESTIONING GOD

1. If I can trust God with my eternity, I can trust Him with my life.  Seriously though, I can’t get to Heaven on my own! That’s the biggest reason I became a Christian, my inability to save myself. If I am trusting God with my ETERNITY, shouldn’t I be able to trust Him with my life?

“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.  In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.” – Proverbs 3:5‭-‬6

2. God can see the whole picture. God doesn’t think the way I do. As a human, I am only able to focus on the immediate and how it effects me now. God is able to see how it will effect me now, tomorrow, and a year from now.

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord .  For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.” – Isaiah 55:8‭-‬9

3. I can glorify God through my hardships. Instead of looking for relief in my trials, I needed to focus on rejoicing in my trials. Sharing with others the blessings God has given me and continuing in my service to Him through a trial are just a few ways I can glorify Him!

“That the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ” – 1 Peter 1:7

4. God works everything for my good. Looking back to 4 years ago, I know the anxiety I suffered was God’s way of preparing me for the trial I face today, with my husband’s health. I can say with confidence, the anxiety God has allowed in my life is for my own good! 

“And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.” – Romans 8:28

5. God promised peace and comfort. “There is never a trial too big that God is not already there.” I’m not sure where I heard this, but I found it to be true. If I am in the deepest valley, God is there. I can never be seperated from Him!

“Weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.” – Psalms 30:5b

Asking God “why?” doesn’t make your trial shorter or easier to understand. The sooner you accept your trial, and trust God, the more quickly you can find peace!

“For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory” – 

2 Corinthians 4:17


Help Lord!

Published on by Carrie NehmerLeave a comment

Have you ever found yourself in a mess that you created? 

Financial problems, relationship difficulties, academic struggles, schedule conflicts, or job delimas – these things can at times be a result of poor choices we have made.

“So what”, you may ask? “Why are you rubbing my failures in my face? I can’t do anything about them.”

There is an account in 2 Chronicles, of a king of Judah named Jehoshaphat. He was a good king, who strove to please the Lord. God was blessing Jehoshaphat because of his faithfulness and service. 

“And the Lord was with Jehoshaphat, because he walked in the first ways of his father David, and sought not unto Baalim” – 2 Chronicles 17:3 

One day, the evil Ahab, King of Israel, came to ask Jehoshaphat to go into battle with him. 

“And Ahab king of Israel said unto Jehoshaphat king of Judah, Wilt thou go with me to Ramoth–gilead?”  

Jehoshaphat knew that Ahab was a pretty horrible man. Ahab and his wife served Baal, and it is said that worshippers of Baal sacrificed their babies to this false god. Not only that, his wife, Jezabel, was persecuting and murdering the prophets of God. 

What Jehoshaphat did next was pretty dumb. He agreed to help evil Ahab. 

“And he answered him, I am as thou art, and my people as thy people; and we will be with thee in the war.” – 2 Chronicles 18:3
2 Chronicles goes on to tell us that Jehoshaphat demanded for Ahab to call in a prophet of God, to seek wisdom from God if they should go to battle. 

“And Jehoshaphat said unto the king of Israel, Enquire, I pray thee, at the word of the Lord to day.” – 2 Chronicles 18:4

 Ahab reluctantly calls in a prophet named Micaiah, but he whines to Jehoshaphat that this prophet never tells him what he wants to hear.

“but I hate him; for he never prophesied good unto me, but always evil” – 2 Chronicles 18:7

Of course, Micaiah tells the kings to not go to battle, that they would not be successful. Ahab becomes angry, and demands he be put in jail. As the prophet is being dragged away to prison, you can hear his shouts to everyone in the room.

“If thou certainly return in peace, then hath not the Lord spoken by me. And he said, Hearken, all ye people.” – 2 Chronicles 18:27

For some reason, Jehoshaphat did not listen to the prophet. It was probably peer pressure. Instead, the kings suited up and rode off to battle. When they arrive at the battle field, Ahab has an idea. 

“I will disguise myself, and will go to the battle; but put thou on thy robes.”- 2 Chronicles 18:29

He convinced Jehoshaphat to wear his kingly attire in the battle, while he himself puts on a disguise. It becomes clear to the reader at this point, that Ahab was only using Jehoshaphat to divert the enemy’s attention away from himself. Unfortunately, Jehoshaphat is so taken with Ahab, he doesn’t see the foolishness in his decision to go along with the plan. 

The battle quickly becomes heated and Jehoshaphat finds himself surrounded by the enemy. They must have noticed him, or something. 

“And it came to pass, when the captains of the chariots saw Jehoshaphat, that they said, It is the king of Israel. Therefore they compassed about him to fight:”

It probably hit Jehoshaphat at that very moment, going into battle with Ahab was a stupid idea. 

Sometimes we don’t realize our folly until it is about to do us harm.

Jehoshaphat cries out to God at the last moment, begging for help. The next part is what amazes me. 

“but Jehoshaphat cried out, and the Lord helped him; and God moved them to depart from him.” – 2 Chronicles 18:31

Yes, you read that right. 

“AND THE LORD HELPED HIM.”

Have you ever done something so stupid that you decided praying about it wouldn’t help? God would never help you, because you got yourself in this mess to begin with?

Don’t believe that lie! If you are a child of God, He wants you to cry out to Him when you are in trouble. Even if the trouble is of your own making! 

“Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.” – 1 Peter 5:7


What a Cancer Patient Won’t Tell You (but his wife will)

Published on by Carrie Nehmer2 Comments


I have debated writing this post for a few months now. It is not my intent to whine, complain, or cause discouragement! God has been SO GOOD to us while on this journey! However, many have asked me how Gabe is “really” doing? So I thought I’d share with you, what he probably won’t tell you himself.
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Often I’ve listened to my husband talk to someone inquiring after his health. He will lightly smooth his struggles over with a butter knife, making it seem as though everything was as sweet as jam. It takes every ounce of self control within me to not enter those conversations mouth first, revealing what he’s REALLY going through!

“Gabe, why do you glaze over everything? Why aren’t you sharing what you are really going through?”

“Care, if I’m not positive when I talk to people, I won’t think positive when I’m alone.”

So here I am, sharing to a world of readers (all 30 of you) what a cancer patient (at least mine) won’t tell you. 

1. They feel sick more than they feel normal. Despite being on two different anti-nausea medications, my husband feels sick a lot. Thankfully, he’s been able to eat, and the steroids have made him even gain a few pounds. He is not thrilled by that, but doctor’s reassure him this is fantastic!

2. They. Are. Tired. All. The. Time. I’m not even kidding. Gabe sleeps about 9-10 hours a night, plus an hour nap every day, sometimes 2 naps! If he does any kind of physical labor, it literally takes hours of energy away from his body. Every day feels like he just ran a marathon.

3. Chemo really, really, really stinks. Think tingling and numbness in your hands, fingers, and toes. Freezing cold sensation when eating or drinking room temperature foods. Muscle pain and weakness when walking or chewing food. Think having to know what your blood counts are every week, having people stick you with needles nearly every day! 

4. Radiation really IS as difficult as they say. Burned skin, mucusy discharge, and bleeding are just a few side effects. Because my husband recieved radiation in a delicate area, he has even more difficulties I can’t mention on a public blog. The symptoms last for weeks after the last treatment.

5. They worry about the future. No matter how good their prognosis is, IT’S STILL CANCER. That means there is still fear of cancer spreading, or recurance of cancer, or serious illness from cancer treatments. They wonder if they will be able to return to work as they once did, and how they will pay the mounting medical bills. 

6. They miss what their life used to be. They miss the freedom to go away for a few days vacation instead of being “chained” to the cancer center. They miss feeling good, playing with their kids, food tasting good, working full time, sleeping soundly…there are so many more things my husband and I miss, we couldn’t possibly list them all!

7. They feel lonely. When friends and family first find out you have cancer, you will feel overwhelmed by their support and love! In time, however, some will get used to the idea you have cancer. For them, life is still going on as normally as can be, and you feel a little left behind. Many times loneliness is there, despite continued love and support, merrily because friends can’t go to your appointments with you, feel your pain, or hook up to your IV’s with you. Loneliness, to some extent, is unavoidable for a cancer patient.

8. It’s hard for their families. A spouse is going to worry more about the future than the cancer patient will worry. The added stress of caring for a loved one who is suffering through treatments along with average daily stresses can easily overwhelm. The fear of losing their loved one is never far from their thoughts. Older kids may struggle with extra responsibilities and having to back out of social activities in order to help their parents. 

9. Preventative treatments don’t feel any less painful or any less scary than treatments given in desperation. Many times I’ve heard, “but aren’t his treatments preventative?” Well, yes, but he’s going to feel the chemo and radiation just as if it were not a preventative measure. 

10. Lastly, a cancer patient won’t tell you that his entire outlook on life has changed. Things that were important yesterday, are no longer on the “to-do” list today. A cancer patient sees more clearly what is truly important in life. 

There are several other truths my husband will GLADLY tell anyone who wants to listen. God has been good to us through this cancer trial! He has provided every single need. We have been overwhelmed by friends and family who love and support us. We all have enjoyed Gabe being home more. Gabe is loving his guitar more every day. And lastly, this jourey is nearly over!

Really, I think Gabe believes that everything has been truly wonderful. He chooses to look at the positives and the blessings, and to cast the negatives behind him. This healthy perspective has been because of God’s Grace. The next time I hear him smoothing over how he’s really doing, I’m going to just keep my mouth closed.